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Tak tahu nak rasa apa atau apa patut rasa sekarang. Dari pagi masuk kerja sibuk cari pusat tuisyen dan tutor di rumah untuk kiddo. Pada masa yang sama, otak bekerja keras memikirkan diri yang gagal menjadi contoh terbaik untuk anak-anak. Ye ke gagal?

Punca rasa macam tu.. Kiddo tak dapat keputusan yang membanggakan untuk peperiksaan pertengahan tahun. Agak kecewa sebab tahu dia memang boleh buat dengan lebih baik. Tahu dah bila masuk darjah 4, pelajaran semakin mencabar. Rasa sedih dan bersalah sebab tak tegas dengan kiddo untuk belajar. Bila cakap pasal tuisyen, daddy pula seolah-olah menyalahkan diri ini bila takut anak penat hantar pergi tuisyen. Kata dia, macam ini lah jadi nya kalau sambil lewa.

Pernah tak rasa 24 jam sehari itu tak cukup? Pernah? Bangun pukul 5.30 pagi, siapkan sarapan dan bekal makanan tengahari. 6.30 dah keluar rumah. Hantar girls rumah mertua dan lepas tu hantar kiddo ke sekolah. Naik LRT sampai pejabat pukul 8. Balik pukul 5, tunggu kiddo sampai 5.45 dan terus balik rumah mertua ambil girls. Sampai rumah pukul 7.

Masa itu lah nak mandi, solat, nak siapkan makan malam, masak nasi, masuk baju dalam mesin basuh kalau ada, nak layan girls, ambil baju di ampaian kalau ada, itu belum melipat. Agak kelam kabut dan haru bila girls nakkan perhatian pada masa yang sama. Itu belum seorang menangis, seorang lagi panjat meja.

Tahu-tahu dah pukul 8. Belum solat maghrib lagi. Kadang-kadang mandi pun belum. Selalunya selepas makan malam, kiddo buat kerja sekolah. Dan pukul 8.00-8.30 malam tu juga, girls dah masuk bilik. Masa untuk bergurau senda dan tidur sama ada dengan mama atau daddy. Kiddo? Siapa nak teman dia belajar? Dah, rasa bersalah di situ. Seolah-olah biarkan dia. Pinggan dalam sinki, meja kena lap, baju yang dah siap basuh kena sidai. Adalah lagi parah bila daddy ada mesyuarat dari jam 8-9 malam. Lalu, semua dibiarkan tunggu pagi esok baru nak buat.


Mama kalau dah masuk bilik selalunya akan tertidur selepas baby tidur. Tahu-tahu dah pukul 12 malam bila baby nak susu. Tiada selamat malam untuk kiddo. Tak sempat nak jenguk dapur, pinggan dah basuh ke belum. Beg girls pun tak tengok atau periksa baju dan pampers untuk esok dah siap atau belum. Sebab mama letih. Bangun pagi sebelumnya jam 5.30 dan tidur jam 9 - 9.30 malam. Bangun 2-3 kali bila baby nak susu. Terjaga bila big girl tertendang belakang badan. Lepas tu, alarm berbunyi. Alamak dah pukul 5.30 lagi sekali. Kain yang tidak berlipat sudah berganda di atas katil bilik no 2.

Rasanya ramai yang menghadapi situasi macam ni. Malah ada yang lebih teruk, mungkin. Lain orang lain cara mereka kendali situasi. Ramai yang kata, kerja rumah boleh buat kemudian bila anak tidur. Sudah tu, bila masanya nak dapat rehat dan tidur yang cukup 8 jam? Hasilnya, eye bag Prada atau Gucci bawah mata semakin gelap.

Pembantu rumah bukan jawapannya. Maka, sekali sekala biarlah rumah tidak berkemas asalkan masa yang ada diisi dengan melayan anak-anak. Lebih baik begitu kan?

Dan rasa kecewa apabila hanya ada masa 10 minit untuk diri sendiri itu pun di dalam bilik air, waktu mandi. Tak sedih pun kan? 

P/S: How to be smart working parents with growing up children?
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